Coming to terms with sporting life as a perennial substitute

There are few more futile roles in life than that of the perennial substitute; the guy who togs out throughout all four seasons, but who never gets anything more rewarding than severe frostbite from standing on the sideline for all eternity.

At least adults can cope with disappointment – their lives, after all, are full of them – but picture the kid whose unquenchable enthusiasm still can’t make up for his or her dearth of athleticism, and who is therefore doomed to life in the number 23 top.

The little lad may never lift the Liam McCarthy or know the comfort of a WAG at the World Cup – but, short of a predilection for masochism, why would he want to train three nights a week just to stand in the way of a winter flu?

Once the games get serious, it stands to reason that you will always play your best eleven or fifteen – but would it be so awful at under-age level to give the gawky kid a chance?

Because that’s what one Fine Gael Senator wants to see happening – and he wants the GAA, FAI and IRFU to make it a rule that everyone who togs out gets half a game.

Neale Richmond is well-intentioned of course – but utterly deluded; what happens, for example, if 25 lads turn up for Saturday’s U-14 league match when you can still only bring in three subs?

He’s absolutely right that the focus has to be on participation, inclusion and enjoyment – but sport has to teach lessons for life too, and the biggest lesson is that nothing is fair or yours by right.

And at least Senator Richmond’s proposal has drawn attention to the woes of the eternal substitute – more importantly, he’s made his pitch at a time when the numbers playing football in this country have fallen.

A study carried out by Sport Ireland showed a sharp drop in the numbers playing soccer, particularly among young men; down to 22.6 per cent of those aged 16 to 19 last year, compared with 30.7 per cent in 2015.

Participation in the sport among the general population also fell – from 4.8 per cent to 4.1 per cent – so perhaps the non-playing participant has just had enough.

For more, read this week’s Connacht Tribune.