Howya has a bad habit of getting lost in translation

There was a Ukrainian man on Galway Bay FM last week who turned out to have a very interesting story about his previous life as a professional footballer which you can read about elsewhere here this week, but during the course of the interview he was also asked what he’d found out about Ireland since he got here – and the biggest thing so far is that he now realises when someone says ‘How are you?’, they don’t really expect an answer.

Because we all know that Howya is a greeting, not a medical inquiry – and the last thing you need is someone who will actually answer the question, for invariably if they do, it won’t ever be that things are just fine and dandy. But in a more prosaic world, a question usually prompts an answer, which is a futile exercise if the inquirer is already halfway down the road before you have the chance to form a thoughtful response.

He was being tongue-in-cheek of course – although, again, not literally – because undoubtedly much stranger and more sinister things have befallen him since he had to flee his native country and end up in emergency accommodation in Galway.

But when it comes to the strange things we say – phrases you won’t find in a dictionary or visitor’s guide – he’s in for a bit of a treat.

Wait, for example, until he finds out that when someone finishes their conversation with ‘see you later’, it doesn’t mean they’ll see you later at all – although he might spend days waiting outside a shop or a pub before this penny drops, because that’s how almost all short conversations end when you’re conducting a transaction in either.

For more, read this week’s Connacht Tribune.

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