Finding his path in life

Ian Kilroy describes himself as “someone who lacks discipline”.

But a glance at the Salthill man’s busy schedule seems to indicate the very opposite.

That’s where Sōtō Zen Buddhism, the Buddhist tradition in which Ian is a priest, has made all the difference.

It means that a man who has always hated mornings rises daily at 6.30am to prepare himself for meditation, after which he gets his two teenage boys ready for school and then heads off to his own job in School of Media at the Technological University Dublin.

“I have a busy life,” says Ian, whose first introduction to Buddhism was as a youngster in Galway during the 1980s, browsing through the shelves of O’Gormans’ and Kennys’ bookshops. These places were a treasure trove for his young mind.

For Irish people looking to broaden their spiritual horizons this was a new era, says the 55-year-old, who lives in Dundrum, Dublin, with his wife Isabelle and their sons, Arthur and Éamonn, aged 16 and 14.

“We were the first generation to have Buddhist texts available to us, as well as critical writings on those books,” Ian observes of that time. Drawn in by their focus on experience and their lack of dogma, he’d often stand in O’Gormans’ reading these books because he couldn’t afford to buy them.

Ian practised meditation as a teenager but “drifted away” from it during his undergraduate days at UCG. However, in his early 20s, when he was doing an MA and still living at home, “an existential crisis” brought him back.

“I had no money and no prospects, and didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life.”

Suffering from intense panic attacks, he “dipped back into meditation”. It helped.

“As did the counselling for students I got in the university,” he adds, even though he only had one counselling session.

“But it was good and the guy I met told me to go back to meditation,” he says with a laugh. For Ian, meditation is “silent sitting”; not trying to achieve anything or become ‘better’ at it.

Meditation is only one aspect of Buddhism, he stresses. But back then, before that religion became intrinsic to his life, “the practice of just sitting” helped with the panic attacks.

Ian continued to meditate throughout his 20s and 30s “with varying levels of commitment.

“I was also going out and enjoying myself. But it was always there in the background”.

That crisis during his college years is one of the experiences he shares in his new book, an engaging and accessible guide to Buddhism, as well as one which offers a clear-eyed perspective on Irish society.

Do Not Try to Become a Buddha: Practicing Zen Right Where You Are is being launched in Charlie Byrne’s Bookshop this Friday evening by Irish Times journalist and fellow Salthill man, Harry McGee.

“It’s about Buddhist spirituality and trying to introduce it to the reader,” says Ian of the book.

Written in short chapters, Do Not Try to Become a Buddha is divided into four sections, in which he writes clearly about meditation, daily life and ethics, the liturgical year in Zen Buddhism, and being a Sōtō  Zen Buddhist here in Ireland at this time.

Pictured: ‘When you sit down to meditate, you are just being present in the moment,’ says Ian of a practice that is intrinsic to Zen Buddhism. PHOTO: PETER HOULIHAN.